


Beyond Good and Evil

by AnchoredTether



Category: Naruto, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Ninjas, Bigotry & Prejudice, Body Horror, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Gore, Graphic Description, Heavy Angst, Horror, Lance has a nogitsune sealed inside him, Naruto AU, Possession, Psychological Trauma, Slow Burn, Team Bonding, Team Dynamics, Violence, and the jutsu/terminology/universe is the same, dark themes, it's based VERY LOOSELY on Naruto, ninja au, otherwise it's quite different, the Naruto AU no one asked for
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-10
Updated: 2019-08-07
Packaged: 2019-12-30 06:51:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18310403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnchoredTether/pseuds/AnchoredTether
Summary: He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster.It's a good thing Lance doesn’t have to worry about that. He’s already a host to one.





	1. Amalgamate

|| [music](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeZPke-i3iM) ||

 

_This was exactly what I hoped would never happen._

_So many years living in fear and dread of what I was, what was inside me, and what I might do because of it. So many years imagining the worst possible scenarios and waking from night terrors that felt too real to be mere dreams. So many years just waiting for the inevitable moment when I would completely lose control. And now those fears had finally come to fruition. I was a monster and there was no justification for the smeared crimson that surrounded me._

_My sister always told me "that which is done out of love is always beyond what is good and what is evil," but as I saw the aftermath laid before my eyes I wasn't sure if there was any love inside me. If love pushed me to resort to the darkness inside of me, was it really forgivable?_

_Would she ever forgive me for it?_

_Adrenaline surged through my veins, causing my hands to shake. My heart hurt inside my chest as if it were about to stop at any moment. The screams echoed in my head and the feeling of hot blood still felt fresh upon my skin, but it wasn't the horror of my crimes that disturbed me._

_It was the pure silence afterwards that frightened me most._

 

* * *

 

Lance spent most of his time alone. Even though none of the younger generation knew what he was, it was evident that the parents still cautioned their children to avoid him. The Hokage passed a decree that no one was to tell their children that Lance housed a nine-tailed nogitsune inside of him, in hopes that he could grow up without prejudice and make some friends, but even a law couldn't prevent people from treating him like the plague. It didn't help that he had black triangular fox ears on his head.

He occupied himself with lots of hobbies. He got incredibly good at throwing kunai, he learned how to knit, he liked to go on hikes along the seaside cliffs, and he taught himself how to fish to help his sister keep food on the table. It was just him and Veronica. She was training at the ninja academy and working in the evenings so she was gone a lot of the time, but the Hokage had a handful of shinobi who kept tabs on Lance and made sure he was getting enough food. Once he turned eight, he became incredibly self-reliant - Shiro no longer had to treat him out to dinner or Coran invite him over for the evening. Part of Lance even preferred the solitude. He felt like he didn't belong among normal people.

He knew what he was from an early age. While it was pretty easy for everyone else to just assume his ears were some kind of kekkei genkai, a bloodline ability (seeing that it wasn't uncommon for shinobi to occasionally have bizarre physical traits), Veronica couldn't keep the truth from him forever. She had to try and explain many difficult things to her younger brother and often times she doubted herself. She had to take on the role of being both a mother and father to Lance, while also trying to be his big sister and friend. She felt like she couldn't succeed at being one without failing the other.

"They say I have monster ears… I look in a book at all the ears and I no find mine." Four-year-old Lance brought over the picture book and set it on the table, pointing to an illustration of a coyote. "They kinda like his but mine are too pointy and black…"

Veronica smiled at his curiosity but something tugged at her gut. She wasn't sure how to answer him. "I don't think you'll find your ears in any kind of a textbook, Lance."

"Because they are monster ears?"

"Noo! Because… because they're unique! They don't belong on any kind of animal, they just belong on you." Even her words of reassurance felt wrong in her mouth. Those ears didn't belong on Lance, they belonged on the demon inside him.

"So am I supposed to tell the kids I have Lance ears?" His ears flattened back. "That's _stupid_."

"Actually… you're not going to attend that preschool anymore."

His brows furrowed and his lips pouted, his voice ashamed and barely above a whisper. "Is it because I bit that one kid?"

She frowned. When Lance bit another kid hard enough to draw blood it certainly had her worried, but she found out another kid was trying to pull off his ears and most of the kids had been teasing him relentlessly. In the beginning, the other kids loved him and got along great with his bright and curious personality, but Veronica figured the parents of the children must have instructed to stay away from him since everyone eventually excluded him. "It wasn't a good environment for you, let alone a learning one. I spoke with the Hokage and he found us someone who would be happy to teach you and take care of you while I'm away."

"…it's because I get into too many fights, isn't it?"

"Lance, this isn't a punishment. It's to keep you safe. I'm scared that the other kids will do more than hit you one of these days. I want you to be happy and to learn, but most of all I want you to be safe. It sounds like you didn't have any of that at the preschool."

"No…. But! … but I still want to fit in… I just…" He let out a sigh as he worried his hands along the edges of the book, staring at the coyote who he felt more familiarity with than the other school kids. "I wish I could be normal."

Veronica narrowed her eyes sympathetically as she took in his dejected state. He was only four years old and was already having to deal with rejection and isolation. Even if the nogitsune inside him hadn't changed his ears, she reckoned the parents would still tell their children to stay away from him. She teetered on whether to tell him the truth or keep him in ignorant bliss, ultimately deciding he was too young to deal with the repercussions of housing a monster.

"Being normal isn't that great," she assured him with a smile. "It's actually kind of boring to be normal."

Lance still pouted at her. "But normal people have friends."

She felt her heart sink lower. "You'll make friends one day, I'm sure of it! You just have to wait til some of them mature and then they'll see how great you are."

"You mean they will see me as more than my monster ears?"

"Of course! But I mean they will see you as more than just your _Lance ears,"_ she said with a playful grin.

He let out a laugh and she counted that as a win. "It still sounds stupid!"

 

* * *

 

Lance was a difficult child to raise. Veronica wondered if it was just his nature or if the fox inside influenced him to be more mischievous. She spent many restless nights dreading that the nogitsune could corrupt her brother at any moment and destroy him. It was why she was so hesitant to share the truth with him, but there came a point where she knew deep in her heart that he needed to know. He was too clever to continue to believe her lie that his ears were a bloodline trait and she knew there was a power in knowledge, even if it was one that was hard to fathom.

He was only seven years old.

Lance was recounting a story from earlier that day about how he could hear something that his governor, Coran, couldn't, and the ensuing madness that followed. The guilt consumed Veronica. She couldn't continue to lead her brother down the dark path of lies for the sake of keeping him safe. The longer he stayed on such a path the harder the truth would become.

"Lance, there's something I need to tell you…" she started, setting down her chopsticks and placing her trembling hands in her lap so he wouldn't see. "Something I should have told you a long time ago… something I've tried to tell you many, many times..."

He sat up a little straighter from where he sat on the floor at the table. He had an inkling of an idea but curiosity still clouded his mind. "What do you mean?"

"It's… it's about your ears. They're not a bloodline trait."

"I kind of figured as much, since you didn't have them…" He frowned, his black triangular ears swiveling back. "I already know I'm not a kitsune like some people believe. You're not trying to tell me I'm adopted, are you?"

Veronica wished it were that easy of a conversation. "No Lance, we're siblings." She offered him a bittersweet smile. "And nothing can change that." Her face fell before she continued. "You know how mom and dad and Rachel were killed six years ago when the nine-tailed nogitsune attacked the village?"

Lance nodded, his ears still pinned back.

"Mom and dad died saving the village, as you know. But you don't know how they did it… they… they were incredible sealers. Our family name, Rivera, is renowned for this skillset. They figured out that the only way to save the village was… was to seal the nogitsune within a human host."

He could feel his heart start to race as his mind sped through all the outcomes of where this was going. His expression was worried as he held his breath.

"Mom and dad tried to seal the nogitsune within both you and Rachel. They tried to split its chakra between you two to make it more bearable but it ended up killing Rachel… and… that's why you have fox ears, Lance. It's because there's a ten-thousand-year-old nine-tailed nogitsune living inside you."

Everything fell away. He felt his stomach drop and it felt like the floor fell beneath him as his heart threatened to break out of his chest. He had his suspicions about his ears, coming to the conclusion that they most resembled a fox, but he could have never guessed they were the ears of a nogitsune which was somehow coexisting inside him without him ever realizing. How many meals had he consumed, dreams had he dreamt, and conversations had he spoken with a demon silently watching and partaking alongside with him? Was it listening to them now? Was it trapped and powerless or was it lying in wait for the right moment to destroy him from within?

He hadn't noticed Veronica moved to his side, wrapping an arm around him and pulling him in an embrace. When had he started shaking? How long were tears streaming down his face? The cries that sounded from his throat felt like they didn't belong to him. He closed his eyes and curled in on himself, burrowing his face into his sister as she stroked his head gently. He could hear the tears in her unsteady voice.

"I'm so sorry… I should have told you sooner, but… I-I didn't know how to say the words, I... I didn't want to make you sad. But… you deserve to know, and I didn't want you to find out from someone other than me. I'm sorry Lance… I'm so sorry that things turned out this way…"

He couldn't speak. All he could do was sob into his sister and try to shove down the voice inside his head that screamed he was a monster. 

 

* * *

 

"Is this a good place to fish?"

The stranger's voice caused Lance to visibly jump. He turned to see it was a fellow classmate, Hunk, and although his shoulders relaxed he still panted to catch his startled breath. "Uhh… yeah, it kind of is. What are you doing all the way out here?" He didn't mean for it to come out so accusing but he was on edge. No one just sauntered up to him and started a conversation, especially when he was deep in the woods by himself.

"Not to sound creepy buuut… I followed you here." His expression was smug but kind. There was something in his smile and the way he spoke that made Lance feel slightly less like wanting to shove a kunai into his shoulder (like he did most people). "I've been trying to get better at fishing and I noticed that you usually head towards the forest at this time of day with a rod and bucket so today I decided to see where you go. It might just be because I'm terrible at it, but I figured maybe the spots I'm fishing are poor choices so I wondered if you knew a better spot."

Lance stared at him, trying to evaluate. Hunk seemed sincere but his guard had too many walls. He trusted people in the past and it only got him hurt. If the kids his age didn't make fun of him because of his shortcomings or his ears, the nice ones always stopped talking to him after a few interactions. He later found out this was because the parents who knew about the demon inside him forbade their children to be around him as soon as they discovered they had befriended him.

Lance was too cynical for his own good.

"It'd be better if you left."

Hunk's brows lowered. "Why? I mean you don't have to teach me for free, I could pay you for some fishing pointers, if you'd like. Or I could at least cook something for you!"

"You'll eventually leave just like everyone else. So you might as well go."

Hunk knew enough to tell this was a defensive response. He didn't know much about Lance aside from the fact he was always by himself. He figured he could use a friend but he was already pushing him away. That only made Hunk want to try harder. " _No_. I don't get it. Why everyone seems to have an unspoken hatred for you, why you push me away when I just want to sit here and talk with you, why all the adults give you unwarranted glares and everyone is suspicious of you when I have never seen you do anything wrong. I mean… I may not be able to do anything about the town shunning you for whatever reason, but I can at least be your friend. Can't you let me be nice to you?"

Lance's expression was pained. "You wouldn't understand."

"That's okay, I don't need to understand. You don't need to understand someone to be kind to them."

He stared at him for a long moment before pulling in his line and snatching his bucket which only contained a single fish. "I'm sorry, I really am," he said softly before sprinting off back towards his house, tears running down his cheeks as his feet pounded against the earth.

Hunk was left there with a disheartened frown as the wheels in his head began to turn.

 

* * *

 

The next time Lance returned to his fishing spot there was a box full of freshly baked cookies sitting on a tree stump near the river. There was a small card that read: _I'm sorry about the other day. I'm still willing to talk if you need someone to listen. - Hunk._

Lance swallowed heavily and set the box back down. He returned his focus to fishing, his eyes continually darting over to the brightly colored box as if he were expecting it to spontaneously disappear at any moment. He let out a long sigh he didn't know he was holding and tried to focus on catching fish. After a half hour, he called it a night and grabbed his bucket only half full and the box of cookies with his free hand and headed home.

Veronica was still gone so he worked on making dinner. Oddly enough, Lance enjoyed gutting the fish he caught. It was mechanical and he didn't have to think about anything else. As soon as he finished the messy job he started working on frying the fish and that's when Veronica walked in.

"Ooooh what are _those?"_ Her hand was reaching into the box of cookies to grab herself one. Lance couldn't do much more than an irritated flick of his ear before one was fully shoved into her mouth. "Mmm where'd you get these? I know _you_ didn't make them."

He frowned. It was true, he was pretty good at cooking but he couldn't bake to save his life. "A uhmm… classmate left them for me."

Veronica's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of her skull. "A classmate made them for you??? Was it a girl?!"

He rolled his eyes and returned his attention to the fish frying in the pan. "His name is Hunk."

She bit her lip, trying to think of the few classmates of his that she knew and she thought Hunk sounded familiar. "What prompted him to make you cookies? Really delicious ones, might I add."

A heavy pit formed inside his stomach. He knew that as soon as he told her that Hunk was trying to be friends with him she would only get super excited and encourage him to try, but he knew it would only end in disappointment, that he would have gotten his hopes up for nothing. He didn't want to relive that pain again for the dozenth time. "He was just being nice, I guess," he answered dismissively.

"If you say so." She was unconvinced.

 

* * *

 

A few days later there was homemade bread left on his doorstep. No note was left but from the bright orange ribbon tied neatly around the cloth that covered it, Lance knew it was from Hunk (it was also obvious from the quality of the bread). It wasn't until two weeks of this secretive food gifting had passed (after Hunk had left a basket full of garlic knots), did Lance nervously approach him at the tail end of their lunch break at school, after Hunk had left his table full of friends and he could pull him aside without anyone noticing.

"Hey, Hunk, I-" He looked around nervously as if he were expecting another student to reprimand him for talking to him. "I enjoyed the uhmm… the food you left me. Do you want to uhm… practice fishing sometime?" He blinked a few times, feeling stupid for how awkward it all came out. He wasn't used to talking to people let alone lowkey inviting them to spend time with him.

Hunk's face lit up with a bright grin. "I'd like that. Same time same place?"

"Yeah that… yeah." He gave a brief nod and then dashed off to his next class.

The first fishing session with Hunk was incredibly awkward for Lance. He didn't know how to interact with other people besides his sister or Coran, much less converse with them. He focused on explaining all the fishing terminology and techniques to Hunk and hoped that would suffice. After Hunk caught his first fish he looked like he had just achieved the world's greatest feat.

"Oh man, I am _so_ excited!" He beamed. "I've been wanting to try my hand at making sushi for a long time."

"I hate to break it to you, but river fish isn't the best kind for sushi." He pulled in his fourth fish and slapped it into his bucket. "These fish only taste good slathered in garlic and butter."

"Ah, well… I can still dream big," he said wistfully. "Do you have any dreams or aspirations, Lance?"

"…None as big as making sushi."

"Aww come on, there's gotta be something you're striving for. You're in the ninja academy, after all. Not everyone is up for that."

"My sister is a ninja. My parents were ninjas," he answered flatly. "It would be kind of disappointing if I didn't become a ninja."

Hunk made a scoffing sound. "You'll become one easy. I'm more worried about myself."

Lance frowned. "You're smart though. And have you seen my jutsu? I kinda suck at everything."

"Even then… you're still the sharpshooter."

"I'm the shar- … what??"

"That day we had target practice with the kunai? Remember that?" When Lance gave a flick of his ears, he continued. "You terrified over half the class with how good you were. Even Iverson said he had never seen a kid our age with that kind of precision."

"Iverson said that?" The man didn't hand out praise lightly, in fact Lance had only ever heard him compliment Keith and Allura. But it was to be expected from the prodigy and the Hokage's daughter. To have Iverson praise Lance, considering what he was, caused him to drop his fishing rod.

"Hey, you alright?"

Hunk's words snapped him out of his trance and he shook his head. "Yeah, just… spacing out, you know?" He laughed nervously and picked his rod back up, pulling in the line. "I'm going to head back. And umm… thanks." He gave him one last look before he left, Hunk offering him a pleasant smile and wave goodbye.

 

* * *

 

Hunk continued to hang out with Lance by the river and he showed him a few other spots he enjoyed fishing. They didn't talk much, but Hunk was slowly getting him to open up. Lance was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, for when Hunk suddenly stopped spending time around him, but that day never came. He had so far outlasted all the nice kids in his past.

After a few weeks of their routine, Hunk finally found the spot where Lance ate lunch by himself. He invited him to sit with him and his friends, but Lance swiveled his ears back, pulled his knees closer to his chest and shook his head.

"Come on, they won't bite."

"But I will," he warned.

Hunk was about to protest that he wouldn't but he lowered his eyebrows, suddenly wondering if Lance would actually attack one of his friends if they said something triggering. He couldn't say with certainty that he wouldn't do such a thing and frowned. "Don't be like that."

"It's in my nature," he said bitterly, hoping the fox inside him could hear it. He took an angry bite of his sandwich, knowing that Hunk wouldn't get the deeper meaning of his words but not caring regardless.

In the end, Hunk couldn't force him. He shrugged and let out a sigh. "Alright... If you ever want to join us though, you're welcome. Just… remember that, okay? If anyone gives you grief I'll give them hell. There's always a spot for you if you want it."

Lance never found the courage to sit with them.

 

* * *

 

"So why does he have cat ears?" Pidge asked as she watched Hunk return to the table.

"Kathryn Holt!" Hunk reprimanded, "You don't just _ask_  why someone's ears are different." He said it as if Lance didn't have triangular canine ears on his head.

"I figured you knew since you're apparently his friend. I was just curious is all." She shrugged her shoulders and stared at her bowl of rice. "If I had to guess I'd say he's part kitsune but I'm pretty certain his chakra would look different if he was."

Hunk groaned. "You looked at his chakra?" Disappointment dripped from his tone.

"What? It's not like I'm looking at anything private," she scoffed. Hunk sometimes saw Pidge's bloodline ability as invasive but she would argue that she's simply inquisitive. It never hurt to have more information on people. She had her skepticisms about Lance and knew that the entire village wouldn't ostracize him merely for having different ears. There were plenty of ninja families with more atypical physical traits. There had to be something more to the boy, something she couldn't yet see. "How did you two become friends, anyway?"

"Why are you soooo…." Hunk gestured to all of her. "…critical?"

"I'm always critical, Hunk," Pidge answered dryly.

"We're friends because he's a really nice guy? We have a common interest? He's not as bad as everyone in the village seems to think he is?"

"It's just… peculiar… he's so closed off from everyone that I'm wondering how you two even met."

"Well…" He gave her a sheepish grin. "I kinda forced my way in."

"How bold of you." Pidge smiled softly at him. She should have known he would seek out those who were lonely. He had done the same to her, after all. "Soooo…. _do_ you know why he has cat ears?"

_"Pidge."_

She sighed. "Alright, fine." 

 

* * *

 

"So what got you into fishing?" Hunk asked one day after school as they stood at the edge of a small lake. He was tempted to ask about his ears to sate Pidge's curiosity but he figured it was too rude of a question this early on in their delicate friendship. He didn't want to give Lance any reasons to turn to his habitual ways and run back to solitude. 

"I learned how to do it so I could help my sister take care of us," he explained, his tone somber. "I mean, she had to take care of herself and me when she was only nine and I was barely a year old. I tried my best to try and take care of myself so she wouldn't have to work as hard. Plus, fishing is relaxing." He shrugged. "It's kinda like mediation, except I get to kill something."

"That took a turn." Hunk laughed. "That sounds rough though, for both you and your sister."

"Yeah… but it's not like we know any better…" He could say that for a lot of tragedies in his life. It was simply the way things were. He didn't know what it was like to have parents. He didn't know what it was like to not be the host of a demon fox. He didn't even know what it was like to have normal ears. They were both quiet a moment and Lance finally decided to share one part of his life with Hunk, in hopes that he could share more.

"Hokage."

"What?"

"That's my dream… to one day become Hokage." He looked over and up at Hunk, his eyes glistening. "It's the only way anyone will ever acknowledge me for what I am."

He offered a bittersweet smile. "I look forward to seeing that day."

 

* * *

 

|| [music](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aDAL5G9Xwn4) ||

 

Lance was sixteen the first time he spoke with the nogitsune.

He ran out of the middle of class when a voice filled his mind like thunder. _It is so good to finally speak with you,_ were the words he heard. The voice was deep and a little rough, like the grating growl of a wolf if it could talk. When Lance made it outside and was alone in the forest, he spoke aloud to the voice in his head.

"Who…" He shook his head. He knew who it was. There was only one demonic entity living inside him. "You can talk?"

Malicious laughter filled his mind and it sent a shiver down his back. _I can do much more than that, Lance. Open your mind and enter our subconscious so I can properly talk to you._

Dread chilled his neck. He knew from Veronica's fears that the nogitsune taking over his body was a possibility, so the idea of succumbing to any suggestions the fox made felt like a trap. "And why should I trust you?"

Another laugh. _You shouldn't. But you're stuck with me, so you can either have a formal chat with me or I can pester you through the rest of your class until you're driven mad. The choice is yours._

Lance growled. "Even if I did want to have some afternoon tea with the demon inside me, how would I go about doing that?"

_You are not very imaginative, are you?_

"Answer the question, fox."

_I'm not you, so I can't answer that._

"Look who's imaginative now."

 _Try closing your eyes and imagining yourself in a realm of joined consciousness or something,_ the nogitsune offered half-heartedly. Despite his insistence that Lance speak with him on this magical plane he wasn't trying very hard to get him there.

He let out an exhale, closing his eyes and imagining as the nogitsune said. Either Lance was more perceptive than he thought or the fox gave decent advice since it didn't take long for him to open his eyes to a different world. Everything was colorless but when he looked down at his hands he saw he was unaffected. He was standing on the shore where a gray ocean ceaselessly crashed into the rocks and sand. He was drawn to the water but the fox's voice, more clear in this dimension, whipped his head in its direction.

"Nice of you to finally show up in your own mind."

Lance didn't know what to expect the demon inside him to look like, but the sight of it still terrified him. It was a giant black fox, easily the size of a horse, its eyes as red as fresh blood. Only one long tail lashed behind it, leaving smoky trails in its wake. A sudden feeling of self-loathing boiled in his stomach when he saw familiarity in the nogitsune's ears.

"Wha… what do you mean by that?" he managed to ask, heavily swallowing his fear. This was the entity that lived inside him all these years and it was difficult to wrap the reality around his head even though he knew it for so long.

"The realm of your consciousness doesn't form until you reach a certain maturity. To put it simply, I couldn't interact with you until you became smart enough to understand my presence."

He narrowed his eyes in confusion. "But I've always known you were here?"

"Hardly. Known it, perhaps. But comprehended it? That's an entirely different level of conscious thought. Even now you're still trembling at my presence. If you fully understood our relationship you wouldn't be scared. You would simply be."

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?" he asked angrily.

"Believe it or not, I'm not just an animal to be caged inside your flesh. We have an obligatory symbiotic relationship - do you even know what that means?"

"Symbiotic sounds familiar…"

"It means we both equally benefit each other, and neither of us can live without the other. If you tried to extract me from your body, you would die. If I overtook your body and slaughtered your consciousness, I would slowly start to die. Our chakra is too intermixed that they cannot be separated without taking too much of the other's and thereby killing them. It's _frustrating,_ really, that my near infinite chakra can be destroyed by my attachment to a puny sixteen-year-old boy."

"I'm confused… a good chunk of your chakra was sealed in my twin sister and it killed her but taking that amount of your chakra still didn't kill you?"

"My attachment to Rachel wasn't solidified before the sealing killed her. Her death greatly weakened me, however, if that makes you feel any better."

"It does, a little bit," he admitted bitterly. "You said our relationship means we both benefit each other. How on earth have you possibly benefitted me all these years? Aside from giving me these stupid ears-" He tugged on one of them angrily as if to prove that he couldn't tear them off his head. "That have only given people more reason to avoid and shun me, so thanks for that."

"Your ears are an advantage you have clearly yet to grasp."

"Advantage?! What, so I can hear a little better than the average human and I can let people know how I'm _feeling_ if I don't show it on my face. Hardly seems like an advantage to me."

The nogitsune chuckled. "There's so little you understand. The more you become like me, the easier it is for my chakra to flow freely through you. I didn't change your ears out of spite, I did it to help you. And make my life sentence in your body a little more fun, but, you know."

"Wait…" Lance's face grew tense. "I can _use your_ chakra?"

The nogitsune offered a toothy grin and it was slightly unnerving. "Now you're catching on."

He learned he could tap into indefinite chakra powerful enough to rival a god and Lance could feel his knees grow weak. "So the ears are a cheat, making it so I'm always able to channel at least a portion of your chakra…" He didn't want to think too long about what the fox meant by him becoming more like it.

He nodded. "As much as I hate to be stuck inside you, I hate being stuck inside a loser even more. So don't worry, I'll make our mutually hated predicament something more… _entertaining._ "

Lance awoke back to the forest with a gasp. "Hold on, what is your name?" He closed his eyes and his mind flashed back to the colorless ocean where the obsidian fox stared him down with eyes of fire. _It only seems right to know,_ he added.

_I go by many names. But…_

_You can call me Red._

 

* * *

 

|| [music](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skGqd6JTJxE) ||

 

It took years of friendship before Lance built up the courage to tell Hunk what he truly was. A few months before graduation when they were both eighteen, it was a day of practicing throwing kunai together when Hunk said something, Lance couldn't even remember what, which triggered his guilt for not telling him his greatest secret. He didn't notice how quick and aggressive his throws became, his kunai starting to split the very tree in half, until Hunk snapped him out of his rage.

"Hey! Lance are you okay?"

"Huh?" He snapped his head to face him, taking in a shaky breath. "No. No, I'm… _dammit._ " He sunk into a crouching position, his hands clawing into his hair and pulling his ears back, his face buried into his arms. He vaguely felt Hunk's presence sitting patiently next to him. A strong hand found place on his trembling shoulder.

"Lance, what's going on?"

 _"I've lied to you_. I'm not what you think I am," he stumbled the words out, his inhales starting to sound hysterical. He could feel a panic attack crawling up his throat at the fear of exposing himself to the only person he could call a friend. What would Hunk think of him then? Would he end up alone again?

Hunk carefully pried his hands from his head and pulled Lance in for a hug, running a hand soothingly up and down his back. "Just breathe. You're fine. You can tell me, it's alright."

Lance gasped for breath, suffocating on oxygen that wasn't there, his body shaking as the attack took a hold of his nerves. He struggled to breathe, still teetering on whether or not to tell Hunk even though he had already taken the steps towards the inevitable truth. He wanted to tell him but he also desired to run and hide as soon as the facts were manifest. What would his only friend think after finding out a demon lived inside him? What would he do if Hunk left him? He couldn't bear to think on it any longer as the fear threatened to consume him. He had to make the leap.

"I-I'm… I'm a monster!" Before Hunk could protest, Lance let out a pained sob and continued, his hands balling up the fabric of Hunk's shirt as he pressed his forehead against his chest. "The n-nine-tailed nogitsune is sealed inside of me… the one that- that nearly wiped out the village, almost the entire village seventeen years ago." He struggled for breath as he awaited Hunk's hatred or fear to manifest, but it never came.

Instead, Hunk hugged him tighter.

"Look, I-I get it," Lance fussed, "if you don't want to be f-friends anymore, if you want to-"

"Lance, you're still _you_ ," Hunk answered simply with a resolute tone to cut through his insecurity. "Does this new information terrify me? A little bit, yeah, I won't lie there. But that doesn't change the fact that you're still my friend. It doesn't change who you are as a person. You're still the goofball who's a nervous wreck with a heart of gold. Having a... a nogitsune inside you doesn't change that. It never did. I mean, you were like this when I first became your friend, right? I just didn't know about it. You're the same now as you were back then. You're Lance, and that's all that matters to me."

The two stayed there for a long time, Hunk allowing Lance to cry in his arms as he held all his broken pieces together.

Lance lived his whole life believing no one would accept him once they knew the truth.

Hunk gave him the hope that he was more than the monster caged inside him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **|| Terminology ||**
> 
> Chakra: The combination of spiritual and physical energy within a person. Chakra is unique to each ninja and is the source for performing ninja arts.  
> Hokage: Ninja leader of the village.  
> Jutsu: Mystical arts a ninja uses in battle.  
> Kitsune: A powerful mythical fox that can have up to nine tails. The more tails, the more powerful the fox. They are rare but definitely not unheard of.  
> Kekkei Genkai: A bloodline ability - a physical characteristic passed down genetically that can give a ninja an advantage.  
> Nogitsune: Dark kitsune, usually mischevious and even malicious in nature.  
> Shinobi: Another word for ninjas.


	2. Collaboration

Lance always dreamt of graduating from the ninja academy but he wasn't quite prepared for the day when it arrived. It felt surreal when Iverson handed him his metal forehead protector. When they shook hands he almost looked proud. Lance wasn't quite sure what to think of it. Iverson rarely showed any kind of emotion and to see him looking at him as a father would his son had him feeling self-conscious. It was no secret that Lance had been the class disappointment until two years ago and many assumed he wouldn't graduate, Lance included.

After the standard ceremony, graduates found way to their families and Lance felt something heavy in his chest as he observed the outward happiness that suffocated him. He kept telling himself it shouldn't bother him anymore but he still felt sad and somewhat envious of the students who had joyful, celebratory parents to embrace them. He flicked an ear and shook off the fleeting moment of depression and made his way out to a more open space to be by himself.

Veronica was still gone on a mission even though she was supposed to be back by now, which only worried away at his mind like a cancer. Missions could have been delayed from something as simple as the weather, but it was usually because of an injury or death or failure. Veronica was supposed to be one of the new sensei so there had to have been something serious that happened on her mission to keep her from being here, aside from the fact that her brother was also graduating. He took a deep sigh to calm himself, found a tree to lean up against, and watched people.

Normally he would have left since there was no one waiting to celebrate with him, but he had to stick around for the team assignments at the end of the program. Unfortunately for him, they decided to stick in a thirty minute mingle time between the graduation ceremony and team announcements. In the midst of all the happy families that made his heart heavy, Lance noticed someone doing the exact same thing on the other side of the crowd. Keith Kogane was leaning back against a tree with his arms crossed, looking as serious and somber as he always did, but there was an underlying hint of something wistful in his eyes.

Lance's brows lowered, but before he could do anything about his classmate he was being tackled in an embrace from an overenthusiastic ginger.

"Lance my boyyyyy!!!"

"Coran! You came?" He was surprised to see his old governor and teacher had attended the graduation ceremony but his spirits instantly lifted with his presence. Perhaps he wasn't as alone as he originally thought.

"Of course I came! It's not every day my favorite student graduates." Coran released him from his rib-crushing hug and placed his gloved hands on his hips, looking Lance over as if graduating somehow made him look different.

"Coran, I was your _only_ student." He rolled his eyes with a smile. "And I was a terrible student."

" _Still_ doesn't change the fact!"

He shook his head with a smile. "Although, now that I think about it, you're probably here to see Allura, aren't you?" Coran was her godfather and she and Lance spent a lot of time together as children, much to Allura's disgust. Lance wanted to be friends with her but he reckoned she knew what he was. Although they grew past their trivial disgust with each other, Allura (while far more cordial than everyone) still kept her distance from him.

"Ah, well." Coran gave him a look as if Lance had caught him red-handed. "You're not wrong, but I definitely came to see you as well. Besides, Allura's plenty busy with her parents at the moment."

Lance let out a hum, crossing his arms. "So… any pointers on being a ninja?"

"You're asking _me?"_ Coran asked with a scoff. "I am only a medic, Lance. I don't know anything about being on a shinobi team."

He shrugged. "You have more experience than me. And you're the best medic in the whole village."

Coran stroked the end of his mustache thoughtfully. "I suppose you're right. I think the best advice I could give to anyone going out on the field is that you need to be adaptable. Sometimes you won't have everything you need or something will go drastically wrong. You have to learn to improvise with what you have in any given situation."

Lance gave a listening nod. "Adapt. Improvise. I think I can do that."

"I know you can," he said with an encouraging smile.

 

* * *

 

"And Team 7 under instructor Takashi Shirogane: Kathryn Holt, Keith Kogane, and Lance Rivera."

Lance felt his heart soar and his stomach simultaneously drop, leaving him disoriented. He greatly admired Shiro ever since he was a kid and now he was his teacher. And yet his teammates, Keith and Pidge, were as intimidating as they were talented. He felt overwhelmed with the assignment but somehow found the strength to stand up and join his new team. Shiro led them to a spot where they could have a conversation away from the other teams.

"I'm sure you guys already know each other pretty well from being classmates for six years, but let's do a round of quick introductions."

"Actually," Pidge interjected, "I don't think any of us really know each other. You somehow got _both_ of the class lone wolves." She stuck her thumbs out to point at the tall boys on either side of her. "One of them even has ears fitting for such a title."

 _Fox! FOOOX,_ Red hollered the correction in Lance's head as if she would somehow be able to hear it if he said it loud enough.

"Oh _shut up_ ," Lance spat, not realizing he said it out loud instead of internally. When three pairs of eyes stared at him in surprise, none of them expecting him to have that kind of a reaction, Lance covered his mouth in horror and muttered, "Did I just say that aloud?"

"Well this is off to a great start," Shiro sighed. "Keith, how about you go first?"

"Sure… what exactly… am I supposed to say?" he asked with raised brows.

"Let's see… how about each of you share three things you love, a hobby or two, and - to add some depth - your greatest fear or phobia. It's important to know your teammate's strengths as well as their weaknesses."

"Alright… I love training, homemade bread, and thunderstorms. I like to explore. Agoraphobia."

"What's-" Lance started, but Pidge cut him off with an answer of, "Fear of crowded spaces."

"Good." Shiro nodded to Keith, then gestured a hand towards Pidge.

"I love my family, I enjoy playing Shogi. And umm… I love peanut butter - but not peanuts. For a hobby, I have an interest in botany. I like to draw diagrams of different species and study their medicinal properties. And…" Her gaze fell, her normally confident demeanor suddenly dropping. "Lygophobia."

Lance frowned. "What does-"

_It's fear of the dark. Ironically._

_Huh._ "Nevermind." Lance wasn't sure if it was his imagination but he could have sworn there was a momentary glimpse of relief in Pidge's eyes. "Okay, my turn. I like garlic knots, the ocean, and… this will sound weird, but I love listening. I love to sit in the forest or on the shore and meditate and simply listen to everything surrounding me."

Pidge's brows were furrowed, her expression inquisitive. "Do you have better hearing with those ears?"

"I think so." Lance jerked his head towards another team several yards away. "Can you hear team eight's conversation?"

She narrowed her eyes as she concentrated, but she could only make out a few words when one of the members spoke louder. "I don't know what they're saying."

"Their teacher is currently explaining the different ranks of missions. Sooo… yeah, I think I can hear better than you guys." Neither Shiro nor Keith contradicted Pidge so he assumed they couldn't hear either.

"So we have enhanced vision and enhanced hearing on our team," Keith mused, pointing to Pidge and Lance respectively. "That'll come in handy."

_You can have all your senses enhanced if you allow me to 'enhance' them._

Lance held back a startled cough, letting out a few fake coughs to cover it when his teammates looked at him. "Anyway. Back to my introduction thing: I actually have a lot of hobbies. Hiking, knitting, swimming, fishing… I also enjoy cooking to a degree." He worried his bottom lip and looked up at Shiro. "Can my fear I have to share be a fear of sharing my fears? I don't know the technical term for that."

_Stupidity._

Instead of responding to the fox Lance just flicked his ears. Shiro looked indecisive. Lance was fairly confident Shiro knew about the nogitsune, and had for quite some time. "It can just be a small fear. You don't have to share with us your greatest fear."

"Yes, he _does_ ," Pidge hissed. " _We_ already did."

"Okay, umm…" Lance was wondering how to word it in such a way that didn't reveal what he was. "I fear hurting others."

"I hate to break this to you, but you're a _ninja_ ," Keith said dryly.

"Not like that! I fear hurting people I care about."

"Why would you…." Pidge trailed off, shaking her head. "It's a phobia. Phobias are supposed to be irrational in nature."

"Right. Irrational." Lance felt his stomach knot at what would have normally been something of reassurance. To fear hurting your loved ones was normally an irrational fear, but most people weren't the host of a malicious demon fox that could potentially turn to possession.

"Wait, you said you like to _knit??_ " Keith asked, his face scrunched up in disbelief.

" _What?_ You can still stab someone with knitting needles."

"…are you saying that from experience?"

Lance was quiet a moment, blinking a few times. "No." It was very unconvincing.

Shiro sighed again. "Alright, it's my turn. I love adventure, meeting new people, and sashimi. For hobbies I like hiking and rock climbing. Any kind of outdoor exploration, really. And believe it or not, I have a great fear of dogs."

Lance gasped dramatically. "Me tooooo! Dogs are always barking at me and chasing me and I hate it."

"It's probably because of the cat ears on your head," Pidge said dryly.

"They're not cat ears!"

"Then what are they?"  
  
"None of your business, that's what!"

" _Guys,"_ Shiro snapped, his expression frustrated. "We're a team now. Pidge, stop being so nosy and Lance, stop being so reactive. If you act like this on the field you'll all get killed. Except maybe Keith. I don't care about your differences. I don't care if you don't 'get along.' What I care about - and what each of _you_ need to ultimately care about - is the missions assigned to you. I'm not asking the three of you to become best friends, I'm asking you to learn to cooperate and use each other's strengths and weaknesses to your advantage in battle. Can you all _try_ to do that?"

After a moment of chastised silence, the three of them nodded, but Keith spoke up. "What do you mean exactly by using each other's weaknesses to our advantage? Isn't a weakness inherently a disadvantage?"

Shiro held his chin thoughtfully for a moment before answering. "Lance, I'm going to use your fear as an example, if that's alright." Lance offered a small nod before his teacher continued. "As you both now know, Lance fears hurting those he cares about. Let's say Lance discovers someone who your team trusted as an ally is actually a double agent. Because of Lance's inherent fear, you two should be able to figure out the ally isn't who they seem when Lance suddenly attacks them. Instead of attacking Lance for going rogue, you would know to trust him because you know of his fear."

"That makes sense… I'm just having a hard time figuring out how to apply that to anyone else's named fears."

"I'm sure you guys will figure it out in time." Shiro gave a reassuring smile. "Especially when you all decide to share your _actual_ greatest fears."

"I! Wh- but we did!" Lance objected, and Pidge and Keith equally looked aghast.

Their teacher's smirk was unsettling. "You three may not know each other very well but I know each of you individually on a rather personal level. I know none of you told me your deepest fear. And on that note!" His demeanor completely changed into a more pleasant tone. "Your first task as a team begins tomorrow at 0500 hours on Altea bridge. Oh and umm… _skip breakfast."_

Pidge arched an eyebrow. "But breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

"With what I have planned for tomorrow, if you eat breakfast _you'll throw up."_ He gave them a smile and waved goodbye. "See you bright and early!" He turned and left the three newly graduated confused and slightly concerned.

"I've always seen Shiro like an older brother," Lance said, "But he makes for an interesting teacher. So, was he right? You two didn't share your greatest fear? Because I certainly didn't."

"I hate to admit it, but he was right," Pidge said.

"Nope," Keith confirmed.

"Well," Lance let out a sardonic laugh. "At least we're good at all lying together, right?"

 


End file.
